The Saga Continues...

Blood Sugar: 101


I was a diabetic mess. I ate what I wanted and only took shots here and there. I was 15 when I was hospitalized for DKA and in the ICU overnight. They started giving me insulin and amazingly I got better very quickly! LOL I know they obviously knew that I wasn't taking my shots, but I assured them that was not the case and I always did as I should and blah, blah, blah. The doctors never questioned me again about it, but how could they not know that I was lying? All the details made it perfectly clear that I wasn't doing what I should. Diabetes was my enemy and I was going to do whatever I had to do to combat it. Looking back, I realize that I treated diabetes as the annoying person that always shows up uninvited. If you just keep ignoring them, eventually they will quit coming around. I realize now all the valuable time that I wasted thinking like that. How many years did I personally subtract from my life by allowing myself to live this way? I spent a lot of time blaming people and it wasn't until I met my husband at age 26 that I had an epiphany. You can't always point the finger of blame at everyone else...more often than not, you need to point it right at yourself.
So when I moved back to Ohio in 2001 , I got a job that offered health insurance and started seeing an endocrinologist. I liked him well enough and I thought he was cute, so it wasn't difficult to make myself go to the appointments. I told him that I realized that I needed to make some changes in my life and I wanted to start on insulin pump therapy. He tried, really he did. I just had absolutely no control of my diabetes and appointment after appointment only showed how futile my attempts were. I hadn't controlled my diabetes for years and it wasn't giving up too easy.
He was in a practice of several doctors and decided I needed to start seeing his colleague. Fine, how bad could it be, right? So I went in for my first appointment and he gave me a formula, a sliding scale for injections, told me to count my carbs and come back in 30 days. I was lost. He didn’t explain the formula, I didn’t know how to count carbs and I was a mess…still. I made an appointment with his assistant and he explained how the formula worked, explained why we count carbs instead of exchanges and told me to test, test, test. I went in for my follow up appointment with the doctor a month later. I counted carbs every time I ate. I was testing at least 4 times a day but it was usually 6 or 8. I hadn’t tested my blood sugar on a regular basis since I was under the strict supervision of my mom. The doctor was appalled by the information I was giving him. He asked me how I thought he could make educated decisions about my health care, if this was the information I was giving him. So I told him to tell me exactly what he wanted…WOW. He wanted me to test 8 times a day AND every day for a month at 2 AM. He wanted me to keep a detailed diary of the foods I was eating and count the carbs. OK, I’ll do it. I wanted to be on the pump and this was the road to get there. I left that day with a mission, made my appointment for 30 days later and went to the store and bought a food scale and new measuring cups. I was going to knock his socks off at my next appointment. So I didn’t get up every day for the next 30 at 2 AM, but I did do it a lot…I’d never done it before. There were FEW days that I didn’t test 8 times a day, but it was FEW. I wrote down amounts and foods and carb contents in a notebook and couldn’t wait for my next appointment….then I went. He was appalled by my records, he was appalled by what I ate, he screamed at me about not taking care of myself. I’d had it. I started telling him what I thought about all of this diabetes crap and as I gathered up my stuff, I told him that it was a pity that his knowledge was wasted on him because he was an ass. I continued cussing him as I left. Told his nurse I was sorry she had to work for him. Then I cussed him some more as I walked through the waiting room. I vowed to NEVER go to a doctor again.
So for a year I continued to use the sliding scale and formula he had given me. I refilled my prescriptions every month and was taking better care of myself even though my BG's never showed that. I woke up every morning with my blood sugar at least 300, but usually in the 500's. I just coped. Figured my dose and continued just taking 3 shots a day of Novolog and Humulin N. Finally, I called in a refill and the pharmacy said that the doctor wouldn't refill it until I went in. What's a girl to do?
I realized that I had to find a doctor. Boy, I didn't want to have anything to do with a doctor, but I was in need. I could go, get the prescriptions written and then I was good for another year. A girl I worked with HIGHLY recommended her GP...She could write a prescription for insulin and that was good enough for me. So I made the appointment. Something strange happened in her office that had never happened to me before...I liked her...really liked her. I liked her enough that I wanted to hear what she had to say. I told her that I wanted to be on the pump and that I wanted her to put me on it.